Author, Journalist, raconteur, professional food taster, small-town bartender impersonator, retired pro baseball hopeful and funny man extraordinaire Charlie Berens is a modern Renaissance man. He wears many hats—mainly trucker caps—and is a keen observer of everything that makes Milwaukee unique.
Berens has built a successful comedic career highlighting the Midwest’s more unusual mores and quirks in a witty, relatable and highly quotable way. The Oconomowoc-born humorist released his first standup special last year, “Charlie Berens: Midwest Goodbye,” and is slated to headline the Wisconsin State Fair Main Stage later this week, on Thursday, August 8, as a part of his Good Old Fashioned tour.
So, what is the perfect day in the life of this humorous Midwest maestro? If he only had one day in Milwaukee, and anything at all was possible, how would he spend it? With an endless array of possibilities and every choice under the sun, what would he do in a 24-hour window? We turned to the man himself, Charlie Berens, to share his quintessential ideal day in Milwaukee.
“I’d wake up in the morning and go for a bike ride through the city from the northwest side through Washington Park. Then, I’d kind of kick it up over to the Oak Leaf Trail, pick it up over there, and take the Oak Leaf Trail down to the lakefront, at which point you can go north or south.
I've gone both, and they're both great rides. But, you know, frigging ideal day, you do both.
Go south, down to the Seven Bridges Trail, and then kick it back north and go take that trail all the way up to Lion's Den.
But anyway, the incredible lakefront views and incredible nature right on the lake—Milwaukee has so much green space, so many cool birds to see, and all that—and there are a lot of great parks here.
I love being outside, so I would do that biking thing in the morning. Then, on the way back, stop at one of the beer gardens. There's one right on the lakefront next to the [Milwaukee Art Museum] – [the War Memorial Beer Garden]. And while you're at the art museum, you might as well go take a stroll through that sucker. I mean, that thing is awesome.
In this ideal scenario, there's both a Brewers game and a Bucks game, so I would check them both out.
And I would end the day by fishing underneath the Hoan Bridge, you know? Because in this ideal scenario, the salmon are also biting…or maybe the trout. Let's go with brown trout. I catch a brown trout at the end.
That is a full day. But it's a great place. Great town.”
You can catch Charlie Berens at his only Milwaukee-area stop of the Good Old Fashioned tour on Thursday, August 8, at the Wisconsin State Fair or at venues throughout the Midwest.
Now that you’ve had a taste of his irreplicable comedic stylings, be sure to check out our full Charlie Berens Q&A to hear his thoughts on if he’d make it as a “Top Chef” cheftestant, what makes the perfect tailgate and the new era of Wisconsin sports.
It’s your turn to plan your perfect day! Map out your stay and discover a little Milwaukee magic along the way as you explore the city.
Welp, that’s all for now. Watch out for deer and tell your folks we says “hi!”
